Riddle Me This.

It's clear by now that I hate a lot of things. In the making of me, my wires must have gotten crossed. Like a radio that got caught in the rain, I am damaged goods. When you turn the dial to adjust the volume, the channel changes. Likewise, every time I find myself angry or hating something, I begin to get this twisted happy feeling. I love to hate. Some people would say that I live this way because I am insecure, but I just consider it to be good judgement. I'm not out there hating black people or charities. I'm hating racism, child pageants, Pauly D and bitches who think they run NYC because that go to a club that Chingy once pissed in front of. 

Here's one more thing to add onto the list of things I hate: Stupid questions people ask in class.
Examples of questions we've all heard people ask.
Q: Do we need to use 12 point font?
Q: Does my paper need to be double spaced?
Q: Is it okay to use a blue pen on the test?
Q: Do I need a #2 pencil for the scantron test sheet?
Q: Does Detroit have a lot of money? (I heard this gem of a question today)
Q: Do you want my 11 page essay stapled?
Q: I won't be here for a week. Will I miss anything?
Q: What country is Rome in?  
Other dumb things:
1) I HATE people who compulsively correct the teacher. For example, say you have class every Wednesday and the teacher accidentally says, "See you kids next Thursday." Suddenly, the class erupts into a state of panic and yells at the teacher as if she's raping and pillaging a village of nuns. "WHAT?! WE DONT HAVE CLASS THURSDAY. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??"













2) I HATE the people who text all of class. 90% of the people you're sending texts to are probably less than a mile away from you. What's even more annoying is that the texter often gets offended when the teacher asks them to put away their cell phone. I'm sure your shitty friend can wait until the end of class to learn that Jimmy never called you back after taking your virginity.
3) I HATE when students don't know how to correct other students quizzes. Sometimes a teacher will give out a quiz and then have the students switch papers to grade them. "UM PROFESSOR, THERE'S A DOODLE ON THE SIDE OF KELLY'S PAPER, SHOULD I MARK OFF POINTS? ALSO, IF YOU SQUINT, HER COMMA LOOKS LIKE A PERIOD. HALF CREDIT?"

It's really nothing short of a miracle that these riddlers have made it past the 7th grade without being beaten to death by the poor teachers who have to answer their questions. "Yes kelly, 12 point font will be just fine."